Letter to LIFE

Dear Life,             

Do you understand happiness? If you have then you should have feel my heart when the first time I feel that everyone already accepts me. You should have feel what I feel; the affection that I finally have claimed from them and their open arms finally understanding me and letting go of the past. That overwhelming feeling before you have decided to change the course of my life.

You witness that harmonious relationship that I've worked so hard to attain, yet still you chooses for me to suffer the hard way. And you instantly brought up another trial that I cannot longer withstand. My sufferings, aren't they enough for you? Why do you have to let me suffer more and more in this society where you are judge by not what you have done, but what they can only see? I am all alone again, walking by myself and enduring the pains that were gone by a minute and back by a second. You should have at least let me feel longer the feeling of being accepted and living a happy and peaceful life.

When I woke up the next day I don’t know how to start another life. I can’t even tell them how I've been silently enduring all the treatments that I am again receiving from them. I’m back to my old self, remaining silent and  making my feelings dumb when in fact I want to scream and tell them to at least believe me. But what’s the point I’m already used to it. And with my hidden emotion I made a solemn vow. It was a vow to never believe again that you are fair, when in fact you had never been fair to me. You don’t understand truth and fairness.

Your newest enemy,

Frances

Dear Life,

It’s been a day since I last wrote you, and I have already broken my vow. You made me hate everyone, but today was different. Someone is talking to me making me feel that they don’t hate me and understand me. It was like they believe in me and that I should not mind what other people are saying to me. That’s when I realize this is me, this is me in your past trials. Not minding what others would tell, because I know the truth.

Hate, that should I feel towards you. But something change when they talked to me. They told me that everything was okay and that nothing is wrong with me, giving me an assurance and smile that I had come to know as my friend. They told me that always believe in God. And time will come that you would give me what I deserve. Their words consoled me, but I cried as I remember how you had been cruel to me.

I broke my vow, because I forgive you.

Love lots,

Frances

Dear Life,

It was yesterday when I found new hope. I have now my true friends to whom I can lean on. Though it was hard, I tried my best to compose myself and never let anyone know that I’m affected. Until that time come. It was at exactly 11:30 a.m. when I’m with my classmate. She confronted me regarding the allegations that has been happening right now. I tried my best to avoid it but I guess it’s inevitable. I pour out all my emotions that has been hidden for how many years inside my heart. This is the first time that I’ve done that. I don’t know what push me to do it but I guess you really are full of unexpected happenings.

Before I should have remained silent, and let them believe what they want to believe. But I guess you played with me again and make me do it. But what surprised me is what happened next. Because of that I nearly loss my life. Right, you did it to me because you want me to realize something. I should have left this adventure called life. But I guess I’m not yet prepared to meet your enemy-death.

Until next time,

Frances

Dear Frances,

I want you to know that I have read and reread your letters; they were beautiful. Silver tears line my worn face as I watch you nearly loss your breath and you’re body stop to move like a dead person. I also want you to know this: I’m so sorry. But your misery, I can’t do anything about it because this was God’s will. But I know how you love me, and even though I put you into many sufferings you never did give up on me. For that thank you. I don’t know how this letter would reach you but I would write it anyway until that day come. Keep on holding to me and have more patience because the day will come when you will realize why I did this to you.

I remember your first words to me. To answer, I do understand happiness. I have seen so much, how could I not? But I’m glad you wrote to me and you finally understand how important I am. And remember just enjoy my adventure and you will find your happiness.

Your friend,

Life